S1.E7 – Sex, Lies & Desi Dating

Anju here.  Strap in and grab some popcorn, listeners, because we’ve got a big episode for you this week!  We bring in a new guest host to help us tackle a complicated topic: sex, lies, and family within the Desi community.  Along the way, Puja stumbles across a new catchphrase:

“I like chocolate in my chai.” – Puja

Listen to Episode 7 He

Read Show Notes Below

Our guest host this week is my cousin, Priya, a PhD student in microbiology at the University of Texas who’s going to cure Ebola someday, probably, and also someone way more fiercely confident in her own skin than any of us.  We ask about her origin story, Shitty Indian points, and the time she spent in an ashram in India.

This episode, we delve into the taboos on discussing sex and romantic relationships within Desi families and whether that comes from religious or cultural stigmas (spoiler: we don’t know).  We also discuss how the prohibition on dating means our flirt game is terrible and Priya offers to school us in the arts.  Plus: the difference in acceptability of interracial relationships with white people versus black people, reconciling with queerness, and how we feel about the prospect of marriage.  Whee!

Believe it or not, we had even more to say on this subject but we decided to take mercy on you guys and leave the rest for another day.

Stay Tuned For Part Two!

Selected/Suggested Readings

Sometimes we use the term “Desi” here is what it means:Desi definition

Forget about Match.com, Shaadi.com is here to get you married.



Shaadi Definition

The Rape Crisis in India

Child Brides

Popular the TV Show

Hijra: South Asian Transgendered

The Kinsey Scale

Hasan at the 2016 Correspondent’s Dinner

Let’s Talk About Me Baby episode 30 – Hasan Minhaj (where he talks about his thought process for the Congressional Correspondent’s Dinner).

And in case your parents didn’t have the talk with you yet


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